Sunday, July 21, 2013

My Darling Husband

So, my husband works as a general manager for a semi-fast food restaurant. It is stressful, with lots of hours. He works with idiots. So he does what is the only obvious thing to do when he is frustrated at work...

He takes it out on my and the kiddo.

For real.

I am going to kill him. I mean, seriously. I know his job is hard and he deals with idiots....but taking it out on the loved ones at home... I might fucking kill him.

I don't know when the last time he and daughter had a GOOD time together. It seems like every time they are together they are pissing each other off. Its like a game to see who can piss the other off first or fastest. I have tried talking to him, but I don't know if it makes any difference or if he even cares. Which makes me sad and angry. I want our daughter to enjoy the time she and her dad spend together. I want her to like him. I want them to get along so I can have a moments peace.

I just don't know what to do anymore with them. Let them fight it out? Eventually they'll figure it out? Keep nagging? Leave it be and wish for the best?

Parenting sucks sometimes.

A lot has changed. Mostly good, some not so good.

So things are changing quickly.

I got a job! Woot Woot! Fucking, Finally.

Not exactly my cup of tea, but it pays the bills, and there is room for promotion. So I am putting of grad school to see where this job leads me. I like most of the people, and I have fun soooooo...wait and see while we get caught up on bills.

Speaking of....

We were approved for loan modification! We can keep our house. You have no idea how good this feels. I am glad I don't have to pack! I am a little disappointed that I wont be moving to a place with a dishwasher. Boo.

My fabulous husband is still managing a (somewhat) fast food restaurant. He has a bunch of employees that suck, but he has to deal with it. I will post more about him later.

I will also post more about my job later.

My daughter is turning 4 very soon. She is really excited. We are having a party and a few of her friends have RSVP'd already. I am excited for her. Its nice that she has friends. However we have run into a problem with school, daycare, and my new work schedule. We might not be able to keep her in preschool everyday if she doesn't get a full day spot. So we might have to do three days at day care and two days at school. My worry is that she will be upset that she won't be at school with her friends everyday and that she wont be ready for kindy next year. We know that she might not be ready but we want to give her every chance we can. I guess we will have to wait and see what happens.

So there is my update. I hope to update more often. I know I say that a lot, but maybe I'll mean it this time.

Sunday, March 31, 2013

Good news!

Sooooo, good news! JM got a General Manager job at the Deli he works at! Super stoked! I know he will be amazing, but he seems a little nervous. I have confidence in him. I am so proud! It will be a battle though, the guy he is replacing was a dip shit. Like, never showed up on time, let people get away with stealing, never enforced rules, etc. Many of the people have expressed a desire to quit and follow the old GM to where ever he ends up at. I think one or two have already quit. So, JM has his hands full coming up. 

BUT with a new job, comes different hours and more money! Woot Woot! I get my hubby every other weekend! He works five 10 hour days and his schedule rotates, but I am cool with that! He will be home for as many bed times, maybe more, than he is now! That makes me happy. 

He is kind of sad about leaving his current job. The owners were really good to him, and he liked his job. Too bad there was no opportunity for growth. At least at the Deli we can buy the current owner out in a few years and own a business of our own. Serious? Own. A. Business. OMG! Happy dance. That is kind of cool. I feel like an adult now. (At least for this second.)

As for me, well… my ever wishy washy mind I am back at the LMHP route again. I found a program in my town that does not require the GRE (which is tooo damn expensive) and is for working adults, two years, and one night a week. I think it is what I want. Plus, it is in my town, not the next largest town over so I will save on fuel.

Plus I have to admit I have issues with only having a “certificate”.  I understand that the paralegal program at this college is Bar accredited, and really highly regarded, but I still want that DEGREE. I want that all powerful (albeit in my own mind) Master’s Degree. I haven’t been in school for 10+ years for a certificate.

Job wise, meh, pay is about the same starting out. I wish I was one of those people who had a calling, like they were born to be a doctor, or musician, or whatever. I just don't have that. 

Friday, February 8, 2013

Holy Shit

I swear this is the last one tonight.

So. I have this crazy theory about race, school shooters, and the prison system. I will not share here because apparently it is awesome. Or so I have been told.

I have also been told to write my paper (because this is a research paper topic I am writing about for the semester) and get this....

Submit it to the ASA conference, the APA conference, the ASC and ASCJ conferences.

IF I got into one of those conferences I could be recruited by a college. Grants, Fellowships, Research... I could write my own ticket.

The possibilities.


This means working my ass off even more to write an insanely long and excellent paper that is worthy of being presented to the elite of the field.

Holy Shit.

Can I do this? Me? Really?

Pick My Future For Me

Ok. I say OK a lot.

So. Graduate in May (finally) with a bachelors in Psychology. My GPA isn't awesome. No groups, clubs, or accolades. My pickins are slim.

I am looking at a Paralegal program. Three semesters, weekend classes.


Masters in Arts of Teaching. High school. Math. Two years with one semester being student teaching and 100 practicum hours.

With the given situation at home, taking the paralegal route would benefit my family the most. I could work full time while doing it, and it is cheaper in the long run. I can make pretty good money too.


I kind of secretly want to teach. I would rather teach college, and maybe one day I could, but I want to teach. I envision myself teaching.

What to do. Someone pick for me.

I Hate The Doctor

Not all doctors, including PA's. But just the spechul few who work at the health center for my school.

1) I am not 18-22 years old. Do not talk to me as such.
2) I KNOW what the hell is going on with my body. I am almost fucking 30, I know what is going on in my body.
3) yes. I have all my problems under control.
4) Seriously? you have to ask every single time I see you why I take two different dosages of the same meds? Ok- I take 100mg off one, and 25mg of the same. BECAUSE IT DOESN'T COME IN A 125mg PILL.
5) Enough with the condescension.

So- now that I have that out of my system I will tell you the story of today.

I have bruises, out of fucking nowhere, on my right thigh. Started Monday with 4 faint, brown ones. Tuesday I got a good 2" bruise on the front of my thigh. Wednesday it is bigger and darker. Thursday it is HUGE. Like the size of my hand. And there are more small ones. I have been dizzy, light-headed, and run down too. To me this screams anemia, but I thought I would see a trained professional to make that determination for me.

You know what I was told?

Its a bruise.

No. Shit. Sherlock.

I was told that I am fair skinned and will bruise easily. Even though I told her I do not bruise easily. I was also told that the brown/green bruises are that way because they are beneath more layers of skin. Follow me here... So, I can have a huge fucking bruise and not know where it is from, from hitting something I don't even remember hitting, that is so deep in the tissue that is is brown? Say wha?

Then she said the spots looked like bruises and was really concerned with someone abusing me. Thanks for the concern. Move on. No. She did not. She harped on it for like five minutes. Hello- if someone grabbed my leg hard enough to leave bruises (soooo deep) I think I would have known. Move. On.

She didn't address my dizzy spells, my fatigue, or light-headedness. No blood draw.


Sent me home. Come back when they cover your body.

Seriously. When they cover my body.


Such a Strange Day

So this morning I saw the doc and the health center at school. I will post about that separately.

Went to target got WAY too many Valentines for the kids school because I thought there were only ten in a bag but there were 24.

Parked at school and while doing so I got the universal "eating out" sign from some guys, if you catch my drift.

Heard a loud conversation about a gay one-night-stand from a kid in class. Got asked by the same kid to work on the test with him and some girl. I was like, sure... I know they asked me because they think I know all the answers because I read the book and talk in class. It was cute how they asked. Like some little kids waiting to talk to a parent. Awwwwwwwww.

Got a B on my test, not cool. I studied hard.

Just general funky feelings today.

I hope everyone else had a good day.